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Posts Tagged ‘venting’

Tired

It has been a tired week around here. Nick worked 60 hours at his regular job, finishing up tax things like w-2’s and 1099’s and payroll tax returns. Thankfully he was able to get people to cover his pizza shifts for the weekend, which was good since he worked all day Saturday.

Raising three children by yourself is difficult. I do not recommend it.

Sunday we really enjoyed church, and even sat in on a meeting about placing membership which is a funny concept to me after attending New Life for so long. Basically you’re saying you love God and plan to go to church regularly. Think we can handle that. 🙂 The worship leader walked up to Nick and I, we had missed the announcement about the membership meeting, and she said, “The first step to getting involved in worship would be to go to that meeting. Can I watch your kids for you?” Heh. So she did. And she fed them gingersnaps, which should have caused a terrible gluten reaction, but we prayed over them when we got home and they didn’t react. Thank you, God. So we’re excited about being somewhere that is excited to have us. And we love how people have reached out to us. I’ve already met two stay at home moms with young kids who live right in my neighborhood. Play dates at the park this summer, for sure!

Tessa smiled at me yesterday. I feel like I can all of a sudden see her personality. She’s making eye contact more, and is such a sweet, gentle kid. After several days where she cried a lot and couldn’t be comforted, I broke down and gave her a pacifier, even though I much prefer my kids suck their fingers if they need to, for many reasons. Hannah and Audrey never liked the pacifier, but Tessa took right to it, and seems so much more relaxed.

Aside from Nick working so much, I have found the transition to three to be very easy. I’m enjoying Tessa so much and she’s such a great addition to our family. She sleeps amazingly well, 5-6 hours at a time at night, is finally nursing like a champ, and smells so good. Never mind that she’s currently fussy even though she’s eaten and has a dry diaper. 😉 I gained 38 pounds with my pregnancy and have lost 23 of that, which I’m very happy with since I’m nursing.

I ordered our cloth diapers today, after our 21 day trial ended. I’m doing regular old prefolds with Thirsties covers (trying one of these too). I have a snappi, which I will probably use more as she starts crawling, but I like that these covers don’t require any kind of fastener, and are easy to launder.

Part of my tiredness today is from staying up till midnight last night, watching Worst Cooks in America with Nick. 🙂 We were very entertained by the show, but found the finale to be terribly anticlimactic. I’d love to go to culinary school, along with about 5 other schools. One lifetime to live is not enough. 🙂

I’m talking with my kids about what we want to plant in our vegetable garden this spring. It’ll be time to start plants in another month or so. I threw together this little chart so I could start thinking about when to do stuff. And while I’m at it, here’s my nifty weekly list that I use. The “friends” box is for people I want to talk with or make plans with for that week. 🙂 Back to the garden – I’m debating whether doing a raised bed, or renting a tiller and amending the sand soil is a better, more cost effective plan…

OK, better go insist on naptime. It’s getting late!

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Could someone please explain to me why the simple job of planning what we’re going to eat nearly sends me into panic attacks? It’s not that hard…list a breakfast, lunch, and dinner and then buy what we need. But it’s sooooo restrictive to me, and I worry about having too much or too little food and that we won’t want what I’ve planned and that I’ll forget some ingredient and not be able to make what’s on the schedule. See? Rather neurotic. I much prefer to cook from a pantry of items we always have on hand, but we absolutely MUST cut our grocery budget to a manageable amount. It’s killing our monthly budget! Sigh…

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Measles Outbreak?

It’s with a bit of fear and trembling that I write this post. I have avoided taking on anything regarding vaccinations here, because I believe it to be a deeply personal choice. As the parents of our children, God will hold my husband and I accountable for the choices we make, and no one else. Therefore I reserve all judgments about the decisions other parents make, especially in this area. If you are interested, I am happy to give you the reasons for the choice we personally make, but I will not debate about it.

That said, have you heard about the Measles Outbreak yet? (Insert sarcasm here)

Several things come to mind:

1. 120 something people in 10 states? Do we have any concept of the tiny percentage of the population that actually is? And they’re going so far as to call it an epidemic?! Even if it is the most cases in 10 years. Good grief.

2. Hard to find good sources to reference on the internet, but if you read books about these things it’s easy to see that these kinds of diseases have natural highs and lows of infection. If my memory serves me correctly, every 10 years there is a high point as the virus mutates, and then it declines again. This happened long before vaccines!

3. Measles is not life-threatening in healthy children, no matter what they try to say about it. They say the same things about Chicken Pox and even the flu. Feed your children nutritious food, limit their sugar and white flour and chemical additive intake, make sure they get enough sunshine and exercise, and give them things to help their immune system when they do get sick. They’ll be fine. Of course there are no guarantees in life (even WITH vaccines), that just means we still need God.

4. Notice they say MOST of the infected were not vaccinated. What are the actual numbers there? And if vaccination is so important and life-saving, why do some people get sick anyway? Perhaps it is better standards of living and cleanliness that caused the decline, and not vaccination at all?

5. The wording of the report makes me mad too. 250,000 children die of this disease every year, but they split that up from “in poor countries.” The deaths don’t happen here! We have good healthcare and good nutrition and watchfulness by educated parents.

6. The Reuters report names the countries where the people were infected overseas. They are mostly western Europe, not poor countries. These people didn’t go to undeveloped countries and come back with measles. It’s just the year for measles to be high. No matter where it started, there would probably be infections.

7. Is anybody ever going to address WHY hundreds and thousands of parents are refusing vaccinations? If they would take the nasty chemicals and preservatives out of the vaccines, that would help. Maybe funding safety studies by companies unrelated to the vaccine manufacturers? Rather than making the parents out to be idiots who are dead-set on reintroducing dead diseases, maybe addressing their concerns would be a better idea?

8. I’m not even going to start with the risks of the MMR…

So, I’m sure you can tell where I stand on vaccinations based on this. 🙂 We have to make the best choice we know how to make, and trust God, no matter what our choice is!

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Down Day

I’m having a bit of a rough day…actually, if I’m honest, it’s been a tough past month.

We’re feeling the gas and food increases around here. We’re seriously considering having Nick take another part time job to help out. That would probably put him at 65-70 hours per week. All of the business opportunities we’re working on are growing, they’re just not growing quite fast enough. Our other option is for me to get a job, and we don’t feel like that’s the right thing to do.

Long story, but I have a foot issue (not athlete’s foot) that is incredibly painful, and that has been keeping me off my feet as much as I can get away with it. I think we’re finally going to bite the bullet and have me go to the doctor about it. More money. Sigh.

Because I’ve been off my feet a lot, my house is a mess. It’s pretty bad, folks. Hard to not get discouraged about it actually.

I haven’t written much real content here recently, simply because I don’t have much to say. I am seeking God for strength. I am reading John Bevere’s Drawing Near. I am working on taking every thought captive. I am taking naps several times a week while the girls nap. I am actually exercising consistently for the first time in my life. I’m faithfully doing the things I feel God has called me to. I’m saying no to anything new.

But I’m tired.

We had a great, fun trip this weekend that we’ve been planning for months. The only problem with vacations is the coming home part…

I’m ready for things to ease up a little.

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On Survival Mode

I hate it, to begin with. Audrey was so sick this weekend, and when people are sick other things don’t get done. I seriously woke up this morning to a kitchen full of pretty much every dish we own, dirty.

I have been thinking and praying about this quite a bit lately: why is it that I can’t allow myself to just “be”? Much of my value is tied up in what I can accomplish. And I don’t think I’m alone in that. Why do dirty dishes have the ability to make us feel like failures?

On Sunday night, Pastor Ross and his wife Aimee spoke at the Young Marrieds group at church. He married us, and we love them so much. They have this tenderness and affection that they constantly express for each other. Yet they are also playful and tease each other constantly. I love to watch them interact. Something that intrigues me is the fact that they often talk about expectations for each other. Aimee apparently doesn’t do laundry much. All their clothes are either in the dirty basket or the clean basket. She never puts them away. Many women would feel so ashamed of that, and for their husband to tease about that, especially in public, would embarrass them deeply. He says about that, “I didn’t marry her to do my laundry. I married her for her character, and because she’s who I want my kids to be like.” And he genuinely means it! And she just laughs and smiles.

Obviously they need to teach their kids to do laundry, and they talk about that. But the point is laundry is a small thing, not a big thing. Most of the things we get all tied up about are small things. Not having too many expectations for each other in our relationships is a topic for another day, and equally important. But I wonder, how can we avoid having too many expectations for ourselves?! How is she able to laugh about that? They’re supposed to talk more next week, and hopefully I can get her to talk about that.

I have noticed recently that if the tone in our house is not light and playful during the day, it’s usually either because I have expectations for myself that I’m not meeting, or I have expectations for Nick that he’s not meeting. Yuck. I don’t want to live that way!

It seems like much of life, especially with young children, is just surviving. They are unpredictable. Your best plans don’t work. I hate survival mode because it makes me feel like I haven’t accomplished anything of value. I don’t want to make excuses for sloppy living though. How do you know the difference between “doing your best” and just plain being lazy?

I know this post isn’t very well organized, but hopefully you’ll get my meaning. I would love to hear everybody’s thoughts, especially the “more experienced” voices here…Leslie? Kim? Jana? Anybody? 🙂

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Cranky

We’re having a rough few days around here. Not sure quite what the problem is.

Yesterday, most of the day was spent following the girls from one thing they’re not supposed to do, to the next thing they’re not supposed to do, trying to keep them alive. When they are caught in the act, both have taken to screaming, arching backs, and generally throwing fits. I’m tired.

Audrey has been following me around the house whining, and Hannah has to be reminded every time she talks to use a nice voice rather than yelling at me or whining at me, neither of which are acceptable and she knows it.

You know that mode kids get into when it just doesn’t matter what is available to them, they’ll find the one thing they’re not supposed to do? Kinda reminds me of the Garden of Eden (eat from any tree but this one…) But, I digress.

What works to get your kids out of that mode? I’m at a loss.

And, the fact is, getting in the car and just running errands might even help, but I’m so wiped out that the 30 minute process of actually getting everybody in the car keeps me from even attempting it. I never knew I could possibly become a homebody… I hardly go anywhere during the day anymore.

I’m cranky and kinda depressed.

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