Life is pretty hard right now.
So many details are involved that I’m uncomfortable throwing them all out into the void that is the web. It’s always something.
As for the things I can share:
Parenting is sooooo hard sometimes. I’m a huge proponent of the idea that you, as the parent, know the right thing to do. I firmly believe that. Except when you don’t.
My sweet cousin-in-law was in a horrible accident last night that could have cost her life. They were just crossing the street after a church volleyball game and she was hit by a guy on a motorcycle. They expect her to recover, but it could be months. She’s in so much pain that they’re keeping her in medicated sleep for right now. I can’t imagine what my cousin is going through, seeing that happen to his wife RIGHT NEXT to him. Can’t imagine.
Sometimes life is just hard. Sometimes it’s good to cry about it.
I’m more convinced than ever that the only way to do life is to seek God wholeheartedly. I would not be getting out of bed in the morning right now, apart from a firm reliance on God’s faithfulness. I’m reading Proverbs every day and asking for wisdom. God promises He’ll give it when we ask. I’m also reading through the Bible chronologically, and currently am totally captivated by the line of Abraham, all the messes they made, and yet how God used their family line to bring the Messiah to all of us. What an amazing Redemption.
Nick and I led worship at church this weekend. We used to lead middle school worship together in college, but it’s been probably 7 years now. We were rusty, but overall it just flowed… I’m amazed at how things like that don’t go away, even if God has you waiting on Him for years. It felt wonderful, and yet funny in a way. My life has become very private, and it’s funny to be evaluated and put yourself out there again. A bit vulnerable feeling, but good. It is so good for me to focus on Who God is, as opposed to my stuff. He is faithful, He is good, He is all the things the songs say about Him, even when my world is difficult. Relief comes in focusing on Him as the answer, rather than on the problems.
Audrey’s eczema has flared up again. It’s really bad and I don’t know exactly why. The only thing we’ve really changed is the eggs we were buying, as our favorite mom-and-pop health food store closed its doors after 15 years. We can get them at another locally owned place, but haven’t yet made the trip. I hoped “pastured” eggs from Whole Foods would be similar to the eggs we were buying (they sure cost enough!), but they’re obviously not. I never wanted to see my baby have to deal with that ever again. It’s so painful. To her and me.
And, I figured out a way to blog. So maybe I’ll be getting back to it. 
Thank you for being vulnerable with your honesty. God is all powerful and he always, ALWAYS answers our prayers… even when we don’t like the answer.
We’re dealing with some hard stuff here too. I think most everyone does at some time with kids… finances just don’t add up, and someone has to change something. I’ll be praying for your sweet family to have peace in the direction he calls.
God bless.
Thank you Laura! When I look at what Chad and Allie are dealing with, our problems are so small! Got some good counsel from my parents last night and I’m hopeful it will make life work a little better.
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